Mental Illness

Brain Balm Vol. 1, Issue 2: Psychotropics – A Healing Prescription

I was first diagnosed with a mental health condition in 1990, the heyday of what were becoming known as "second generation antidepressants." Alternatives to lifetimes of misery in locked wards of psych hospitals gave psychiatrics a whole new tool to treat those desperately depressed. Even "family doctors" were getting into the act as drug representatives passed out samples like happy pill candy of the dubbed "Prozac generation." But my depression in 1990 was not garden variety and these pills I took sent me into a medication-induced psychosis, keeping me up in a manic frenzy for six days and six nights concocting mission schemes and conducting ministry initiatives (as documented in my memoir When Despair Meets Delight). Ultimately, I would break with conscious reality and become a danger to myself and others. Were the drugs the cause of the psychosis or, because they were not properly prescribed, did they just light [...]

Brain Balm Vol. 1, Issue 2: Psychotropics – A Healing Prescriptiontonyroberts2024-08-26T13:03:23-04:00

#remissionispossible

I have big news! I noticed yesterday I was feeling mellow. The only word I had for it was effortless. Today, I realized the voices in my head that have been constantly demanding my attention for over three decades have been silenced. Praise God and pass the sugar free sweet potato pie! #remissionispossible

#remissionispossibletonyroberts2024-08-26T13:03:23-04:00

Hope for Troubled Minds: Dear Bobby, from your grateful mom.

Dear Bobby, One of my greatest accomplishments in life was becoming your mother - I had hopes and dreams for the man you would become. Your intelligence, compassion and determination in everything you did brought me a great sense of pride. Bipolar disorder no doubt changed the way I see the world and what I now want for you, my loving son. This brain illness at times has made you say and do things uncharacteristic of the person that I know is deep inside of you. It is an illness that has caused much turmoil for you, for this I am deeply sorry and only wish that as your mother I could take the pain away. Despite great suffering, despair and heartbreak, bipolar disorder has taught me so much. It has taught me that we live in a world where those with serious brain disorders are discriminated against. We live [...]

Hope for Troubled Minds: Dear Bobby, from your grateful mom.tonyroberts2024-08-26T13:03:23-04:00

Mental Health or Brain Illness Awareness?

Recently I've been sharing my story in a variety of places that reach people interested in faith and mental health. I've gotten a wide ranges of responses and I'm delighted for this. I want to share one with you that I found very thought provoking. Hi Tony, am appreciating your posts on FaithNet but how come you’re promoting brain illness instead of focusing on nervous system dysregulation and recovery? Things like the importance of restorative sleep and techniques to calm our nervous system? My short answer is borrowed from a quote of Jesus in Mark 2.17a -- It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. May is known as mental health awareness month and, from one perspective, this is unfortunate. While it is true that the mental health needs of many need to be addressed, it seems lately we have tipped the scale to favor those [...]

Mental Health or Brain Illness Awareness?tonyroberts2024-08-26T13:03:23-04:00

Sharing My Story with Law Enforcement and Facebook Responses

I published the following post and it elicited much response: My name is Rev. Tony Roberts and I live with my wife Susan and lab Briley in Columbus, IN. I have a diagnosis of rapidly cycling bipolar disorder with psychotic features. Every day is an adventure. Some are joyous. Others are volatile. Thanks to the grace of God, the miracle of medicine, and the support of my caregiving team, I do relatively well, though I have limitations others do not have. On my best days, you could never tell I have a severe mental illness. Then there have been days when I’m confined to bed and see no future beyond the next labored breath. In February of 1995, I was riding high — an ambitious pastor with a young family at a church poised for growth. I was driven to succeed, to make a difference in people’s lives and have [...]

Sharing My Story with Law Enforcement and Facebook Responsestonyroberts2024-08-26T13:03:23-04:00

Psychotropics and Side Effects: You are getting very sleepy.

“I was not taking [my prescription] quite as often as I was technically supposed to. Partly, I kept forgetting, but also there was something else I couldn't quite identify, some way-down fear that taking a pill to become myself was wrong.” ― John Green, Turtles All the Way Down “Listen to the people who love you. Believe that they are worth living for even when you don't believe it. Seek out the memories depression takes away and project them into the future. Be brave; be strong; take your pills. Exercise because it's good for you even if every step weighs a thousand pounds. Eat when food itself disgusts you. Reason with yourself when you have lost your reason.” ― Andrew Solomon, The Noonday Demon: An Atlas of Depression I have been taking psychotropics in one form or another for nearly thirty years. As someone diagnosed with rapidly cycling bipolar disorder with psychotic features [...]

Psychotropics and Side Effects: You are getting very sleepy.tonyroberts2024-08-26T13:03:24-04:00

Hope for Troubled Minds: To my best friend, I call you mom

Jonna Terhune is a social worker living with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder. She writes, "... [my diagnosis] does not define me. By the grace of God, I am still alive and blessed to have the support of my best friend/mother. I know this letter cannot show the extent of sacrifice and love that my mother has given to help me live but I do hope that it gives a glimpse into our experience. I pray that one day I can give back as well as pay it forward. Thank you for spending a few moments to read my letter to my mom." To my best friend, I call you mom, I never thought I would make it this far. You stood by me through all the sleepless nights, not just as an infant but as a teenager and adult when mania engulfed me or depression strangled my heart [...]

Hope for Troubled Minds: To my best friend, I call you momtonyroberts2024-08-26T13:03:24-04:00

Hope for Troubled Minds: To My Dearest Ann from Your Honey Bunches of Oats

Kwee Ann Yap was born on March 31, 1963, in Selangor, Malaysia. She is the youngest of 3 siblings. Growing up, Ann was not keen on socializing, she mostly kept to herself to avoid any kind of social activity. She loved reading and spending time with her family. Steve was born Steven Nonaka on August 25, 1949, in a Sugar Plantation Hospital in Waipahu, Hawaii. He is the oldest of 4 children, a brother and two sisters. His stepfather adopted him and his younger sister, changing their last name to Fukunaga. The family moved several times before finally settling in at Pauoa Valley located in Honolulu, Hawaii. In late 1997 Steve decided to explore a forum for pen pals, and it was there he found Ann’s bio and started to correspond with her. Steve felt Ann was a good and loving person in working with children with developmental disabilities. They [...]

Hope for Troubled Minds: To My Dearest Ann from Your Honey Bunches of Oatstonyroberts2024-08-26T13:03:24-04:00

Hope for Troubled Minds: An Open Letter to a Fellow Traveler by Brandon A.

Dear Fellow Traveler, Did you think life was going to go like this? You had plans and dreams about work, life, accomplishments, where you wanted to live and with who. Then mental illness stepped in. Now what? I was 14 when the darkness fell on me. I had been a freshman: insecure, loud, loving, caring, smart, prideful, naïve, hopeful, occasionally hardworking, unfocused, etc. I played drums in bands, played goalie in soccer, and played risk with my friends, sometimes for days. Then I was nothing. I was a contaminant. I was walking anguish. I got home every day and carried myself upstairs to my room. I would turn on the radio, collapse into my comforter, and sob. The music drowned out the crying so no one else could hear. I was not alone. Kay Redfield Jameson had bipolar disorder, like I do, and she survived. She had become a clinical [...]

Hope for Troubled Minds: An Open Letter to a Fellow Traveler by Brandon A.tonyroberts2024-08-26T13:03:24-04:00

Hope for Troubled Minds: A Prayer to be Rooted in Love by Nancy Boucher

Nancy Boucher is the ninth of thirteen children born into a first generation Italian American family. The importance and value of family has been an enduring force in her life. She taught special education for 24 years in public schools, starting programs for children with behavioral challenges. Her responsibilities included screening, observation, and evaluation; developing and implementing goals with students; consulting with teachers, administrators, and parents; and providing in-service assistance to staff. She loved my job, and was always attentive to and thankful to each of her students who taught her how to become a better teacher. She is well aware of the challenges facing families and their children when dealing with a serious condition, not yet totally understood. Twenty four years ago her youngest son got sick with a serious mental illness and her family's life as they knew it veered off course. They were catapulted into a wilderness [...]

Hope for Troubled Minds: A Prayer to be Rooted in Love by Nancy Bouchertonyroberts2024-08-26T13:03:24-04:00